Why yes, it has been a while since we've "talked." My apologies. While most is telling how exciting and great Christmas was out there in bloggy land, mine wasn't at all that exciting. It was mostly filled with stress and frustration. I guess maybe I should start with some background info (insert "rewind" noise here).
In April my mother moved in with us. It was supposed to be temporary. We were gonna move her into my grandmother's house so we began to remodel. All of our extra money and time went into that house. We didn't care since we were inheriting the house anyway.
As I watched my mother's condition (she has Parkinson's) worsen I really began to question whether she could even be on her own. Mom didn't want to go to assisted living and I felt guilty even suggesting it. Of course this caused Dustin and I to argue (he's a much more hard ass than I am). Well anyway a month ago, fate stepped in and we are being forced to sell the property anyway because Medicaid is doing an estate recovery for the money that Grandma benefited from. So that's where all the stress started. After many tears and sleepless nights, I made peace with that and encouraged Mom to help me start looking for somewhere safe for her to live. Oh My, did that start World War III in Casa des Costello. I swear Mom's head completely turned a 360 and I covered my face expecting pea soup to projectile from her mouth.
At this point she was falling several times a week, each time leaving behind a path of destruction. Blood, cherry Dr. Pepper, down shower curtains...you get the picture. So I had conversation with her doctor and immediately there was a team of physical therapists, occupational therapists and even a social worker coming to help her.
The decision was made that she WOULD NOT be able to be alone and couldn't even live with me for she needed 24/7 help. Although that was a relief off of me, I still felt awful for Mom. She's only 56. I couldn't imagine giving up my independence at that age. After many arguments and threats that Adult Protective Services would get involved if she didn't go, Mom finally gave in.
We found a great place 5 minutes from the house who could take her December 30th. Prayers had been answered and smooth sailing from here on out right? Nope; not with my luck.
Mom had an exacerbation of her Parkinson's and ended up in the hospital. This was Tuesday. On Wednesday I was told that the hospital couldn't keep her because Medicare wouldn't pay because she didn't qualify for admission. So the battle with case management started. Mom couldn't even stand, much less walk and I was supposed to bring her home with me. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. I screamed, pleaded, made threats from Wednesday morning to 9:00 Wednesday night. I started back on the phone 7:00 Thursday morning and begged the long term care facility to take her early. After much pleading and reminding them she was "private pay" and I would take her somewhere else they finally caved. We got Mom moved in. But now I feel bad and guilty. She seems more depressed than usual. I was able to bring her home for Christmas for the day. But still we're trying to get her moved in. And I guess D has been so fed up so long he just needs a break which means trying to get him to help is like pulling teeth (sorry babe). I do understand though. He has been a huge help and advocate during the past month. We both need a break.
I guess its just a bad time of the year. Christmas doesn't feel as good since Dad passed 4 years ago and then losing Grandma this year certainly didn't help. Thank goodness for an awesome friend who included us with their family on Christmas Eve. It helped tremendously!
Sorry this is so long but this is the first time I've actually had to time to sit down and process it all. It has been a whirlwind.
But let's leave this on a good note in hopes of a great new year. We got snow and another day off of work. 8 inches we had. It is so beautiful and makes D happy; reminds him of home. Also we had wonderful news that one of my friends is pregnant and another just adopted a baby boy. This news defiantly made me warm and fuzzy which is a big difference from the scrooge I had been.
Next blog will be happier, I promise. Here's hoping 2011 will be much kinder.
